Why Forgive?
I believe there are a few things more difficult to do, before men, than to forgive someone who excuses himself or herself. This demands effort, audacity, humility, love, patience… all that we tend to not be or have naturally. However, as children of God, that is what we are supposed to do. Why? That is the question I would like to answer today and I would like to invite you to discover it with me.
The first thing, is that, as children of God, our heavenly Father has all forgiven us first. We have seen that through the blood of Jesus Christ, we can be forgiven of our sins if we repent. So, if this God who is so great, so perfect, so marvelous who loves us despite our faults, forgives us, how much more do we - - imperfect creatures have to forgive one another? In plus, God asks us to do so! Therefore, in forgiving, we are obeying Him! It is what is written in Colossians 3:13: “Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”
The second thing is that, in refusing to forgive, we put ourselves in a position that does not belong to us: that is God's. This means, the refusal to forgive is a form of judgement and also of condemnation toward the person who offended you. Furthermore, the Bible says God is the just judge (in Jeremiah 11:20). Thus, may we put away our pride and decide to forgive others like we would ourselves.
There were times where I hurt someone dear to my heart. I did not really think about the damage it would do, and I was very strong in my remarks without even wanting to come across as rude. However, after talking to a friend, I realised the degree in which I was hurtful. As I have said, it was unintentional, but I quickly became aware that I hurt this person. That is what lead me to contact her to ask for forgiveness of my actions. It is then that the worst thing happened to me: during our conversation, I realised that it was not the only time I had been awkward.
I asked God to forgive me, but I was questioning myself even though this person forgave me. Throughout a whole week, I tortured myself as I rethought about all the people I had hurt with my words and attitude in the same period of time. I really wanted to ask for forgiveness from these people, so did I. But this was not enough to end the feelings of guilt I was feeling (even though everyone forgave me). At the young adults gathering that followed, we had a time of prayer where we prayed for one another. I explained the burden I was holding onto to two persons there, and one of them told me it is prideful to not forgive yourself, which is an unhealthy behaviour: in refusing to forgive myself, so in judging myself, I tried to take the place of God. Nonetheless, if God has already forgiven me, who am I to condemn myself? Especially as a child of God.
In the book mentioned last week, Jean-Claude Florin and Dominique Mourot also added that forgiving is a way to come closer to the image of God, to be in communion with him and to be liberated of certain torments. They explain that the refusal to forgive ‘infects’ our friendships and that forgiveness leads to reconciliation.
For a better understanding of these points, I highly encourage you to read this book (if you understand French, I do not know any in English, but we can try to find one if you need so).
To finish off, I wanted to add that, just before writing this article, I was reading, without even looking for it, on a well-known social network, that we must all forgive since we all make mistakes. What I understood from the post is that, refusing to forgive is a way of forgetting that we are not better than one another…
I would like to let you ponder on all that was said above. I invite you to learn to forgive, to choose forgiveness. As a Christian, God will give you the strength to do it. And if you have not given your heart to God, today is not too late to do so! God wants to forgive you and have a relationship with you. You only need to say "yes" to Him and ask Him to come into your life.
Have a nice week,
Do 😊
(Translated by Jane)