Forgiveness
As humans, we make mistakes. You and I make them, and the hardest part is it will not cease any time soon. We will only be made perfect once we return to our Creator, Lord and Saviour after having serving him faithfully: when he will return or when he will call us back to him (after death). In my Communication courses of last year and this year, my professors would often repeat that, in communication, the most important thing is not what you say, but the manner in which the listener receives the message. I admit that these previous sentences may not seem to be completely related, nor to the title of the article, but allow me to make the connections amongst these three points. Our relationships with others are based off of communication, and because we are imperfect, the relationships with these people are very fragile. I am certain you are aware that we may often offend others with what we say, the way in which we say it, the manner in which the receiver receives and interprets the message. Unfortunately, once something negative is said, it may be very difficult to take it back as well as the consequences of it.
A relationship may be tricky to fix after bad communication. One has to rebuild their trust with the other, and above all, must forgive the offender. This applies not only to humans but God when we hurt and disappoint Him, which is sin in both cases. Disobeying God, harming others, doing or even thinking of doing something bad are all sin, and negatively affect our relationship with God.
In these two situations, I can say that there is no healthy relationship without forgiveness. In the next lines, I would like to talk to you about the people who you should be in peace with after you hurt someone.
That first person is God. As I have already mentioned, each time you disobey God there is a disappointment associated with the action. However, even though you may fall short of His expectations, but are still seeking to have a good relationship with Him, the first thing to do is ask for forgiveness. If you repent, which is to turn away from your habitual sins out of a resentful heart, you will be forgiven your sins. I am very confident on this subject, because the Bible says: “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9).
The second person is the one you have offended. It may be challenging to reconcile with this individual whether or not you intended to hurt him or her. However, no matter who this person is and how they feel, and regardless of the circumstance, the relationship will suffer without forgiveness. On your part, it would take humility to own up to your mistakes or risky actions, and ask for the person’s forgiveness. This way, you will have the assurance that you did everything in your power to make things right. The fact that you would have decided, in your heart and before God, to have such an attitude, will prepare you to change your previous mindset when it comes to treating others properly. The reason why you need to be in peace with this person is because God asks you to do so in Romans 12:18: “ If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.” This scripture confirms that you are obligated to do everything in your power to establish or restore a healthy relationship with God and the one you offend.
The third and last person is you. In fact, when you hurt those around you, when you go against the will of God or his divine plan for your life, and when you act against your loved one (which is anyone since God wants us to love each other as we love ourselves, as mentioned in Matthew 22:9 and in Leviticus 19:18), you hurt yourself in the process. In the same fashion that you want to be forgiven for hurting someone, you have to forgive yourself. As I have already said above, no relationship can survive without forgiveness, but the truth is, you live with yourself daily, and this will not change anytime soon, aha.
Why would you feel so guilty? It can be because you disobeyed God, which can lead to a lack of confidence in yourself or based on disregarding what He says or it may have to do with your new relationships for example. There are numerous reasons why you may feel guilty. However, once you ask God for forgiveness and the person you hurt, and that you are certain you are forgiven, you have to work on yourself.
Let the Holy Spirit work within and through you so that you become a better person and obtain the strength needed to forgive yourself.
This is necessary in order that you may have a peace of mind and a steady conscious; to live a balanced lifestyle and to be at peace with yourself; to be able to get up in the morning, look yourself in the mirror and be determined or encouraged to leave the mistakes in the past. It may all seem easier to say than to do, but it is very important. Nonetheless, this may take a lot of time to get the hang of, and you will certainly have to pray about this subject, even get someone else to pray for you until you feel the peace of God working in you.
The reason in which I am writing on this topic is because I do not think there has ever been a perfect day where I completely obeyed the voice of God. I do not think there has ever been one day in my life where I went to bed praising God for completing everything He asked me to do and avoided all He told me to: to do this requires one to pick up his cross daily and deny his flesh, and personally, I struggle with this and am far from reaching this goal. The reason for which I speak about this is because, as I have already explained, one must do all in his power to maintain peace with everyone.
Therefore, I highly encourage you to face the different conflicts in which you are involved, and to seek forgiveness. Do not stop praying to God so that he can give you the strength to forgive, in a wise manner. This is another way to look more like Jesus.
May the Lord bless you in the week to come,
Do 😊
Note: It is imperative to highlight that the topic of forgiveness is very broad. We could talk about it for months. If all goes as planned, this subject will be revisited and expanded on later. Nevertheless, even if we spend hours on this topic, we will not be able cover it in its entirety! So, once we finish this blog, I cannot promise you that you will have all the keys of knowledge on the subject. If you have questions, do not hesitate to contact us via chat, email or Instagram. We will do our best to respond to you. This article is mainly based on my experience and I commit to make another one more detailed on forgiveness.